Tuesday, May 8, 2012

68 unimportant things about partying in the desert that you don't need to know

Heading inland? Here are a 68 unimportant things you don't need to know.  Not on the list: 1. Drink plenty of water.  2. Wear sun protection.  3. UFOs are real. 

  1. You can begin your departure from LA well after sun-up and still fully escape civilization in time for plenty of fun.

  2. The journey from LA to Yucca Springs is a scenic drive in and of itself.

  3. Bring beer.

  4. Bring dogs.
  5. Bring babies.
  6. Address numbers on this street sound pretty redundant.
  7. If there's no sign when you get there, you may be destined to create one.

  8. This is Domeland.
  9. There's plenty of parking.
  10. This blends right in.
  11. This blends in too.
  12. And this blends in, three.
  13. Here's an example of desert foliage:
  14. Watch out for cat's claw. It's named for its cat claws.
  15. You'll be in awe of Joshua trees. You can find these in Israel too.
  16. Don't worry about these these if you don't have a horse. You won't have to worry about falling off and impaling yourself, as long as you don't have a horse.
  17. This isn't a spaceship, but it'll get you thinking...
  18. ...about findin' some chicks.
  19. Keep it classy! There are children here!
  20. It would be interesting to explain this logo to a child.
  21. Maybe just show them the unicycle.
  22. Or play a sport.
  23. Or give them a baby animal.
  24. And an espresso. Of course.
  25. Challenge yourself: Try to photograph a dog at a party in the desert, standing still.
  26. Look down. This is what a dog sees.
  27. Look up. Don't miss the fantastic view.
  28. There's no one up ahead. So take the opportunity to shoot some guns.

  29. I think this is what Axe body spray has been aspiring to evoke all these years.
  30. Big rocks are nothing but a bunch of small rocks put together.
  31. At least the guy in the logo practiced SAFE sex.
  32. Everyone appreciated this but no one ever talks about bathrooms as much as they really think about them.
  33. If this were the West Village, SoHo, TriBeCa, Murray Hill, or the Flatiron, a space like this could bring in $1500/month.
  34. These guys didn't know they looked so dramatic from far away.

  35. So he may not know how dramatic the backdrop looks. Or, he may. He grew up here.
  36. Here's what he was standing over.
  37. As the sun goes down, the colors of nature morph beyond fantasy.
  38. More importantly though, let's just put this out there. This looks like a pussy, right?
  39. Again, they have no idea how dramatic they look.
  40. This is a super moon, which means your werewolf friends are probably having issues right now.

  41. This bonfire is a nice deterrent from the quickly dropping air temperature:
  42. Now is the time you're thankful for grocery stores, grills, and flashlights.
  43. You fully appreciate food.
  44. Before you go to bed, think fondly of the Barbie art in the dome.
  45. In the morning, go to the coffee shop, order an espresso, grab some chalk, and keep making art.
  46. Try to get a picture of the Humane Society Building Bingo Hall Thrift Shop.
  47. This dog:
  48. Here's how a car runs completely on vegetable oil:
  49. If you can impress George at the SwapMeet, he'll give you a free crystal.

  50. Best strategy: Buy something.

  51. You're a fairly quick and scenic ride from interesting sights.
  52. First stop: Here.
  53. These signs are probably just suggestions.

  54. The Integratron beckons you.
  55. This is a tree in the desert.
  56. There are no nails inside the Integratron. But there is an Etch-a-Sketch.

  57. 3pm in May: A comfy, dry 80+ degrees F.
  58. You'll chuckle at this sign, and then feel sad.
  59. If someone tells you they're taking you to Giant Rock in their giant van, this is the result:
  60. What people see at Giant Rock:

  61. What dogs see at Giant Rock:
  62. Someone spray painted this rock with "VAGINA", but it's okay, because kids and dogs can't read.
  63. This is what kids and dogs can't read, but women can OWN:
  64. Giant rock is surrounded by many, many, not giant rocks.
  65. If you've been wearing boots this whole time, your feet are happy and you're ready to go shooting again.
  66. When the party's over, look back one more time, just to say farewell.
  67. Stop by the town coffee shop on your way out, end up supporting Ron Paul.
  68. These wind turbines in front of the setting sun mean you're leaving the desert.


  1. Wind *Turbines*. Siemens. Nitpick. Sorry.

    1. Hey Kit, thanks! Updated from "windmills" to "wind tubines", thanks to you!

  2. Cool shit keep on keeping on, chances ill ever see this website again? Slim. :(. But i still hope you respond back this shit is amazing.

    1. Hey thanks! I appreciate it. Hope against all odds that you do see this website again! Really, I'm glad you like my stuff!

  3. made me smile, thanks

  4. Clean your camera, it looks like a flying snake is in most of the pictures

  5. Someone remove that shit from the lens... XD

  6. Go Ron Paul! I handed out those flyers here in Tampa. If your going to the convention and need a place to crash let me know!


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